RvB: Mind Tricks
by Phantom117
Summary: No memory? Stranded in an unknown location? Ex Freelancer? Sounds bad right? Well, that's what i'm going through right now... (Takes place between seasons 11-12. Some aspects of Mind Games is used.)
1. Chapter 1

"Ugh" What just….wait, where am I? I was just….i was….i don't remember what I was doing before this. That can't be good. That's not good, is it? Who the hell am I talking too? Great, now I think I'm crazy. I'm in some sort of small, dark box. Actually, it's more like a cylinder, but who cares. Long story short, its dark, and I have no idea why I'm here ore how I got here.

I start to feel along the sides of the tube, searching for anything. I literally mean anything, it could be a light switch for all I care. Moving my hands over my head, I feel some sort of lever. I guess I should pull it right? What could happen? Gripping the lever with two hands, I pull down.

There's a sharp expulsion of air, and a dull ***thunk*** as a door pops open before me. The small cabin is instantly flooded with light. A rectangular window of light stands in front of me, seeing no alternative way out, I choose this.

Putting one hand on the edge of the rectangle, I pull myself up and out of the small space. I'm in some sort of canyon, with rock walls on most sides. The canyon is large, and a dense multitude of foliage lays past the canyon walls.

_***Click***_

The sound of a safety being flipped off grabs my attention. Safety means gun, and that means somebody has a gun one me. Fucking great. Turning my head, I see the black barrel of a shot gun pointed at my head.

"Well, look what we have here." A man wearing red combat armor says. His voice has a sense of oldness to it, and not in the good wisdom kinda way. More in the "Im a crazy obsessive weirdo" Kinda way. Looking down, I notice that I'm also wearing armor. How did I not notice that?

The armors main color is neon orange, with a dark green contrast. It looks just like the armor the other man is wearing, but I'm pretty sure it's not. I don't know why, but I have a feeling that mine is different somehow.

"Whatcha doin here? Are you a blue?! Dragnabit….those dirty blues are trying to spy on us! Im gonna ask you one more time….are you a blue?!" With that, the old man threateningly prods me with the barrel of his shot gun.

Out of instinct, I grab the barrel, and shove it downward. The man lets off a round, but it fires harmlessly into the dirt between us. Before he has the chance to load another shell, I shove upward, tearing the gun from the man's hands, and ramming him under the chin with the butt.

He stumbles back, and I jump out from the small hole. Landing on my feet, I swing the shot gun around and cock the slide, loading in another shell. How the hell did I just do that?! I should not be able to do that! I have no idea how I knew how to do that!

Two more soldiers run toward us. One in maroon armor, the other in straight orange. Although the orange one wasn't really running, he was more of speed walking. They both carried rifles, the Maroon carrying a standard assault rifle, and the Orange carrying a BR three round burst rifle.

Something about them seems…..familiar. I'm not sure why, but it just seems like I know them. Before they are standing with the man in red, I already have my shotgun trained on them. They don't make a move to attack, which is good. I really don't feel like killing anybody.

"Sarge, who the heck is that?" The maroon one asks the man in red.

"He's a dirty rotten blue!" The man In red, or Sarge, replies.

"But Sir, he's wearing orange armor, just like Grif."

"Hey! Don't bring me into this!" The orange one says.

"So Grif is a blue? I shoulda known. I knew there a reason I always wanted to kill ya Grif."

"Sarge, your stupid plots for killing me are becoming a little old, don't you think? I mean, do you know how much effort it would take to switch teams?" Grif asks.

"All you would have to do is literally walk across the canyon, and switch sides." Simmons says, a hint of annoyance in his voice.

"And that Simmons, in too much effort for me."

"You are the laziest fucking person I know."

"You don't really know that many people Simmons."

"Oh shut up jackass!"

"Both of you, quit yer yapping!" Sarge yells at both of them. " I have a plan, since both of you have rifles, Grif can run a distraction and hopefully get painfully, and mercilessly torn to shreds by my shotgun, while Simmons-" Sarge's words are cut off by another shout.

"Hey! We heard gunshots and wondered if everything was okay!" The shout came from behind me, so without taking the shotgun off of the other soldiers, I turn my head in that direction.

Two more armored figures are walking toward us. One wearing light blue armor with yellow highlights. The other wearing a teal, turquoise, aqua, whatever the fuck color it is! Both men stop when they see me holding a gun on the others.

"I can't leave you guys alone for one minute can i?" The light blue armored man says. There's something about his voice….it feels familiar, like I should know it. He walks a few more steps, before stopping cold.

"Uh, Wash? Everything ok?" The teal armor says. Without saying a word, the man walks forward, until he is about ten yards away from me.

"Do you know this guy Wash?" the teal one asks, catching up with his friend.

"Yes" He says, glancing at the teal man, then he looks straight at me. "You're supposed to be dead."


	2. Chapter 2

"_You're supposed to be dead." _The sentence echoes in my mind. Dead? How can I be dead if I'm standing right here, alive? And how does this man know I should be dead? That could mean a few things. One, he could know me, or he might've worked with me. On the other hand….what if he's the person who tried to kill me in the first place?

Suddenly, my left arm jerks forward and the shotgun is ripped from my hands. Damn, one of the soldiers behind me just shot me! Whipping my head around, I see the Maroon soldier backing up, his rifle raised. That's got to be the asshole that shot me. I burst into a sprint, aiming straight for the Maroon clad soldier.

He lets off a round, which comes out as a three round burst. I roll forward, and narrowly miss the oncoming bullets. I spring up, bringing my fist up, under the soldiers chin. His head snaps back, and I tear the rifle from his hands. Using the butt, I knock him right between the eyes. Before he hits the ground, I'm sprinting for the orange one.

Another three round burst flies at me, but it misses about two feet to my left. Another burst, and another miss. I slam into him with my right shoulder, causing him to topple over. I point my rifle to his head, but before I can pull the trigger, something lands on my back.

"Only I get to kill Grif!" Oh great, the red soldier jumped on my back. His arms are wrapped around my neck, and he's trying to choke me. Reaching back, I grab his shoulder transition my weight forward. The combination of me pulling him, and his own weight being thrown forward is enough to get him off my back. He vaults forward, and lands on the ground. His hits the orange soldier straight in the crotch.

"OWWW!" The orange one moans, holding his balls. I hear someone running up from behind me, and I turn around. The Teal soldier is sprinting at me, with some kind of glowing energy sword. He slows about five yards away from me, and we circle each other.

I'm trying to figure out a way to disarm him, before he can stab me with that thing. I can guess he isn't too keen on attacking me after what I did to his friends. Wait…the soldiers I just took out are wearing reddish armor, and he's wearing bluish armor, so they must not be on the same team. But wait, where's the teal guys friend?!

A fist to the back of my head quickly answers my question. My vision blurs, and my legs give out from under me. I can hear my own thud, as I hit the ground. The teal soldier was only a distraction, while the steel one came up from behind. These two are defiantly more skilled than the others. Blinking my eyes, the blurriness starts to dissipate. I can hear muffled voices, so they must not know I'm not knocked out.

I slowly move my head, and I can see a pair of teal legs only inches from my face. My hand snaps out, closing around one of the teal guys' legs. I pull, causing him to fall to the ground. I spring up, and face the steel armored man.

I rush forward, aiming a left hook for the man's head. I swing my fist, but I don't hit anything. The man parries left, and brings an elbow down on my back. Stumbling forward, I turn back around. This time he rushes me. He throws a series of quick jabs, which I successfully block. He throws a right hook, but I move my right arm to intercept it. I catch his arm, causing a gap for me to attack. Bringing my knee up, I thrust it into his gut. He lurches forward, and I hit him with an uppercut. His head flies back, and his body follows.

"SWISH!" I duck, and a blue blur flies over my head. Turning around, I see the teal soldier had gotten back up.

"SWISH!" He yells, and swings again. I step back and the sword cuts short. I immediately lunge forward, driving my fist into the soldiers' chest. He stumbles back, and drops the sword. Crouching, I sweep my leg out, catching the teal soldiers' already stumbling legs. He falls back, unable to keep his balance.

"Agent Washingtub! Agent Washigntub!" I hear the yell coming from the same direction both blue soldiers came from. I see another soldier running at me. Well, running doesn't really describe it. It's more like an uncoordinated jog. He's weaving back and forth, and he keeps yelling 'Agent Washingtub' over and over.

That name… it sounds familiar. It's like I know it, but it's not right. I recognize the name…Washingtub…Washingtub….

"You're not Agent Washingtub?" the voice pulls me from my thoughts. "I'm looking for Agent Washingtub, do you know where he is? I bet he misses me! I have to tell him something important!"

"W-who are you?" I ask, slightly confused. He isn't scared, or terrified. He's either extremely brave, or really really stupid.

"Well I'm Me of course! Who else would I be? Well, I could be O'Malley, but I'm not angry. Or am I?"

He continues to ramble on, about cookies and orange juice. And….alien babies? Jeez, this guy is nuts.

"Hey, HEY!" I yell, I capture his attention. His helmet looks at me, which I notice is very old tech. All the other soldiers are wearing newer models, but he's wearing an older version. Weird. "Where am I?" I ask him, not really expecting a legitimate answer.

"You're with me!" See? I knew this was gonna happen.

"No, where are we? As in a location." I ask again.

"Were standing…right here." He replies.

"No! What is our location? Coordinates, a map, anything!" I practically scream. Damn this guy is getting on my nerves!

"Agent Washingtub!" He says gleefully. Wait, if Washingtub is one of the soldiers I took out….shit. I feel something connect with the back of my neck, and I'm out cold before I even hit the ground.


End file.
